Pleasuring the Peen

Providing you with hands-on tips!  

When we think of solo play for the penis, we might imagine that a simple stroke up and down with some hand lotion is all that’s needed to do the trick, but why limit yourself? Just because you’re taking care of a basic need doesn’t mean the experience needs to remain basic. 

Here are some helpful reminders and tips that might help you to explore new ways to appreciate solo pleasure this month and beyond. 

Vibration can be your friend: The penis (especially the head) and the clitoris are actually homologous meaning they are of the same tissue and can function/feel very similarly. They are both richly endowed with nerves that sense vibration and respond pleasurably to it. If you haven’t tried using a vibrator on the penis before, consider this an invitation.  

Soft and Sexy: Your front bits don’t have to be standing at attention to have value or receive pleasure. For cis men of any age, you may find that your desire and sexual appetite don’t always align with your ability to get or maintain an erection. And for many trans women, being on HRT can often mean finding difficulty in staying stiff. Iconic vibrators like the Magic Wand have been a friend to many a frenulum and phallus for decades and are enjoyed all over the shaft and head regardless of erection, while also being perfect for perineum placement. Also toys like the Manta or the Pulse Solo allow for use even when the penis isn’t erect.  

Lube isn't just for penetration: It’s awesome that you have some lube on deck, yay you! But if you think it’s only useful for penetration then you are missing out on a prime time pro tip. Lube can make any stroke feel slicker and smoother for longer, harder play. It also can make a world of difference if you’re using any type of toy like a vibe or stroker. Stroke Creams work nicely for external use because they are usually made of oil- just don’t get it near your latex condoms. Silicone lube is awesome for stoke play, especially if you’re into water whack in the shower, as it’s waterproof and won’t rinse away quickly.  

Sensually Yours: Quickies can be fun but it's certainly not the only method available. So many of us learned masturbation by trying to be quick and efficient, but you also deserve slowness, tenderness, and exploration. Try experimenting with longer sessions and more intentional time finding new rhythms. This can be done with edging, or taking yourself close to the edge…and pausing to linger in the sensation and rebuild. 

Your size is lovely just the way it is and completely deserving of care and pleasure. Whether we’re talkin body size, height, or cock size, your body is bangin! Try not to critique or focus on yours or other’s body ideals/goals but rather appreciate the body you have right now. It’s taking you through your whole life and is present to carry you even further. See if you can take some time to just show it some love and celebration.